[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, Mr. Tribbiani is on the phone.]
Mr. Tribbiani: Gotta go. I miss you too, I love you, but it's getting real late now我得挂电话了，我也想你 我爱你，但现在很晚了
Joey: (Snatches the phone) Hey Ma. Listen, I made the appointment with Dr. Bazida, and... Excuse me? (To his dad) Did you know this isn't Ma? 妈，我和包西达大夫约了韶光 什么? 你知道这不是妈吗?
(His dad nods. Cut to later. Joey is chopping mushrooms)
Mr. Tribbiani: Her name's Ronni. She's a pet mortician. 她叫罗妮，宠物殡葬业者
Joey: Sure. So how long you been... (Goes back to chopping) 你和她多久了…
Mr. Tribbiani: Remember when you were a little kid, I used to take you to the navy yard and show you the big ships? 记得小时候我常带你去海军军港看大船?
Joey: Since then?! 从那时候?
Mr. Tribbiani: No, it's only been six years. I just wanted to put a nice memory in your head so you'd know that I wasn't always such a terrible guy. ...Joe. Y'ever been in love? 不，才6年
我只想勾起你美好的回顾 让你不会以为我一贯是个大烂人 乔伊，你爱过吗?
Joey: ...I d'know. 我不知道
Mr. Tribbiani: Then y'haven't. You're burning your tomatoes. 那便是没有 你的蕃茄烧焦了
Joey: You're one to talk. (Puts the mushrooms in a saucepan) 别想转移话题
Mr. Tribbiani: Joe, your dad's in love big time. And the worst part of it is, it's with two different women. 乔，你老爸爱得无法自拔 最糟的是我爱两个女人
Joey: Oh man. Please tell me one of 'em is Ma. 拜托你见告我个中一个是妈
Mr. Tribbiani: Of course, course one of 'em's Ma. What's the matter with you. 当然个中一个是你妈 你是怎么搞的?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Joey is lamenting to everyone about hid dad's affair.]
Joey: It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading this double life. He's like actually some spy, working for the C.I.A. (Considers) That'd be cool.... This blows! 这就像你某天起床溘然创造你爸是个双面人 就像是为中情局事情的特工 那一定很酷 但这个很烂
Rachel: I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? (She walks over near Chandler and his gaze stays very obviously on her chest) Why do they have to become people? Why do they have... (Notices Chandler) Why can't you stop staring at my breasts? 我懂 为何父母就不能是父母? 为何他们就得成为人间男女? 别再盯着我的胸部看
Chandler: (Without looking up) What? (Looks up) What?
Rachel: Did you not get a good enough look the other day? 那一天你还看得不足吗?
Ross: Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee. 我们都已是成年人 此事只有一个办理之道 既然你看过她的胸脯 你该当让她看你的小弟弟
Chandler: Y'know, I don't see that happening? 办不到
Rachel: C'mon, he's right. Tit for tat. 拜托，他说得对以牙还牙
Chandler: Well I'm not showing you my 'tat.'我不会让你看的
(Door buzzer goes)
Monica: Hello?
Phoebe: (Intercom) It's Phoebe.
Roger: (Intercom) And Rog.
Monica: C'mon up. 快上来
Chandler: (Sarcastic) Oh, good. Rog is here. 这下可好，罗杰来了
Joey: What's the matter with Rog? 罗杰有什么不对劲吗?
Ross: Yeah.
Chandler: Oh, it's nothing, it's a little thing... I hate that guy. 没什么，小事 我讨厌这家伙
Ross: What, so he was a little analytical. That's what he does, y'know? C'mon, he's not that bad. 他便是这种人 别这样嘛，他没那么糟
(Cut to Chandler, Ross and Roger sitting at the table. Ross is upset)
Ross: Y'see, that's where you're wrong. Why would I marry her if I thought on any level thatthat she was a lesbian? 这便是你缺点的地方 如果当初我觉得到她是女同道 我何必和她结婚呢?
Roger: I dunno. Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail. 我不知道 或许你想让婚姻失落败
Ross: Why? Why would I why? Why? Why? Why?
Roger: I don't know. Maybe maybe low self-esteem, maybe maybe to compensate for overshadowing a sibling, maybe you... 我不知道，或许自傲心不敷 或许是填补你让你妹相形见绌的愧疚 或许…
Monica: Wait-wait, go back to that sibling（兄; 弟; 姐; 妹）thing. 等等，回到妹妹的话题
Roger: Well, I don't know. I mean, it's conceivable that you wanted to sabotage your marriage so that the sibling would feel less of a failure in the eyes of the parents. 什么?我不知道 你要使你的婚姻触礁 让你妹在父母面前不那么抬不开始
Ross: That that's ridiculous! I don't feel guilty for her failures! 这太荒谬了 她不争气我并未感到自责
Monica: Oh! So you think I'm a failure! 你认为我不争气?
Phoebe: Isn't he good?
Ross: Nonono, thatthat's not what I was saying... 他不错吧我不是那个意思?
Monica: Y'know, all these years, I thought you were on my side. But maybe what you were doing was sucking up to Mom and Dad so they'd keep liking you better! 多年来我以为你支持我 但或许你婚姻失落败目的是想巴结爸妈 让他们更心疼你
Ross: Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good! 我娶女同道是想让你建立自傲
(Cut to later. Rachel is in tears)
Rachel: You're right! I mean you're right! It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace, and and the Weebles' Cruise Ship. Oh, which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in. 你说得对 那不是“威伯”的问题 而是威伯游乐宫和游轮的问题 它上面的救生艇让威伯能缓缓驶出
Roger: That's tough. Tough stuff. C'mon, Pheebs, we're gonna catch that movie, we gotta get going. 那滋味不好受 菲比，如果想看电影我们现在该走了
Phoebe: Oh, okay. Feel better, Rachel, 'kay? 打起精神来，瑞秋
Roger: Geez, we're gonna be late, sweetie... 菲比，我们快来不及了
Phoebe: Oh, okay. Listen, thanks for everything, Mon. 感激
Monica: You're welcome.
Roger: Listen guys, it was great seeing you again. Mon, um, easy on those cookies, okay? Remember, they're just food, they're not love. 各位，很高兴和各位再度见面 摩妮卡，饼干别吃太多 牢记，那只是食品 不是爱
(He shuts the door and Ross and Monica fling cookies at it)
Monica: Hate that guy! (Throws another cookie) 我讨厌这家伙
